I am still fairly new to this life of parenting, but from what I know so far I find it to be totally hilarious. It is not always hilarious immediately I have known it to have a time delay, but it definitely helps the situation when you can see the humor in it. For instance the first time I took baby levi and junebug the dog on a solo walk I thought it was so sweet...levi snuggled up in this front pack, me getting out and about, and feeling so confident that I even thought to let the dog have some fresh air. Then just as we rounded the corner levi decided that was the ideal opportunity for spitting up (vomiting) all over his mama. As I stood stunned in the middle of the street, while junebug the dog was winding her leash round and round my legs, having no idea what to do, but noticing that spit up was seeping through my many layers of shirts, embedding itself in the front pack, coating not only my hair but the hair of my baby I really didn't think it hilarious at the time- thus the time delay.

Below is a sample of some Hysterical truths about parenting the little ones. For the whole story look here

Thinking of Having Kids?
Do This 10 Step Program First

Lesson 2
A really good way to discover how the nights might feel...
1. Get home from work and immediately begin walking around the living room from 5pm to 10pm carrying a wet bag weighing approx. 8-12 pounds, with a radio turned to static (or some other obnoxious sound) playing loudly.
2. At 10pm, put the bag down gently, set the alarm for midnight, and go to sleep.
3. Get up at midnight and walk around the living room again, with the bag, until 1am.
4. Set alarm for 3am.
5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2am and watch an infomercial.
6. Go to bed at 2:45.
7. Get up at 3am when alarm goes off.
8. Sing songs quietly in the dark until 4am.
9. Get up. Make breakfast. Get ready for work and go to work (work hard and be productive.)
Repeat steps 1-9 each night. Keep this up for 3-5 years. Look cheerful and together.

Lesson 4
Dressing small children is not as easy as it seems.
1. Buy an octopus and a small bag made out of loose mesh.
2. Attempt to put the octopus in the bag so that none of the arms hang out.
Time allowed for this- all morning.

Lesson 6
Go to the grocery store. Take the closest thing you can find to a pre-school child. (A full-grown goat is an excellent choice). If you intend to have more than one child, then definitely take more than one goat. Buy your week's groceries without letting the goats out of your sight. Pay for everything the goats eat or destroy. Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having children.

Lesson 7
1. Hollow out a melon.
2. Make a small hole in the side.
3. Suspend it from the ceiling and swing it from side to side.
4. Now get a bowl of soggy Cheerios and attempt to spoon them into the swaying melon by pretending to be an airplane.
5. Continue until half the Cheerios are gone.
6. Tip half into your lap. The other half, just throw up in the air.
You are now ready to feed a 9 month-old baby.